I was shocked, I was embarrassed and ashamed all at the same time.
Where did this behavior come from?
Where did this burst of rage come from?
I wanted to quit being a pastor. I wanted to go home and hide under the bed I was so embarrassed. I wanted to run as far away from everyone as possible. But through that outburst God still loved me. His love never changed for me. God never gave up on me. I actually learned a valuable lesson that afternoon on that San Diego freeway. The lesson is: nothing can separate me from the love of God.
Now I’m happy to admit to you that I haven’t stuck my middle finger up like that since.
Each of us will sin. Each person will do things that we are embarrassed of, find shame in and regret. The bigger question is how do we respond to our actions and sinful behavior. We can run from God, thinking He is mad at us. Or we can run to God, knowing He loves us.
I'm thankful for the words Paul writes to the church in Rome:
38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38-39This is the same for you. Nothing can separate you from God's love. Nothing was able to separate the young, 24 year old, pastor from God's love. Live in this hope and truth today!