Personal Health and Growth

This week I was up in Redding, CA taking a course at Tozer Seminary. I have been working on Seminary for about 5 years now and this last course falls in my top 5 of favorites. I've been in ministry over 7 years now and have been a pastor for over 6 of those years and this material was new to me.
So many times as pastors we go through life almost driven by the craziness of the rush instead of the pace of God. We allow unhealthy boundaries to decide our future instead of planned out, prayerful, decisions. This week helped me to identify areas in my life where I have allowed unhealthy patterns to form and not keep them in check. I wanted to take some time in this blog to just point out some areas we discussed that especially stuck out to me and how I want to change because of them.

*Boundaries are critical for your sanity

*How do pastors embrace emotions and not just "deal" with life situations that arise

*What happens in the Limbic System can effect Brain Stem function

*Teenagers don't have a fully developed Neo-Cortex (brain) and therefore cannot fully think through situations

*What are my personal expectations and who defines those?

*Not all stress is bad; but when you don't manage your stress it gets out of control and can consume you

*Listen to the rhythm of your body

*90% of relational conflict arises from the packaging of the communication and not the context

*Boundaries preserve us for the long haul and create space in our lives for what matter most

*Conflict can bring great health and growth in our life

This course has started some thinking in my life that has never been expressed to me. I am going to work with Charity about outlining healthy boundaries that will allow me to: Love God, Love my family, and be a great pastor. This will require me to say "no" to some great opportunities but it will establish a healthy pattern in my life so I can sustain in ministry and not burn out. Please pray for me to comprehend this material so I can last in ministry and see thousands of people come to Christ in my life!

My little girl is growing up...

So this post is just dedicated to my amazing family that is growing. Sophie Marie is going to be 17 months old tomorrow and Leah Joy has about 7 more weeks in Charity's tummy until we get to meet her! My girls are growing:

Sophie when we went on Family Date a few weeks ago




















It seems pretty undeniable that she is my daughter















Sophie has a different feeling about the snow than we had expected




















But a few weeks later I took her snowboarding and she changed her mind

Grandma Remembered

About three weeks ago I got this on my arm.
The tat is in memory of my grandma; Maria Hettler. I could add a better picture but that's not the point. The point is that my grandma was a huge influence in my life growing up. When my dad and mom split up she let us come live with her. From what I remember I shared a room with my grandma until I was five; she was an amazing woman.

Every day after school we would head to her house, after we moved out when I was six, to go have dinner with her. I can remember countless times that she picked me up from school because I was "sick". She was a huge help to us growing up and I can remember that we pretty much did everything with my grandma. I would shovel her walkway when it snowed, stacked wood for her, go in the creepy shed in the backyard and even pick her flowers from her front yard.

I know I will never forget my grandma but this is going to help others know about her. My grandma was Catholic so the praying hands with a rosary seemed appropriate. Her name is in there but hard to tell from this pic. So thanks Grandma for all you were for us; I wouldn't be the man I am without you being there for me!

My 30th

So the rumors are true... I turned 30 this year!
When I was growing up I never thought that I would live past my 18th birthday; it is evident that God has a different plan for my life than I thought. This year's birthday was so amazing. Charity totally surprised me with some of my favorite things and gave me some new adventures in life.

On my birthday we went to family dinner at my favorite restaurant, pretty much of all time, Bonefish. This place is amazing! If you have not been you have to go check it out; I love the food, the service is top notch and one of my friends owns it so that is always nice! Charity made plans for us to go on a family date; which I totally loved cause it is always a laugh having Sophie around!


Then for the big surprise... I drove a Nascar! That is me in the drivers seat of car #45! Charity and my mom went in and got this package deal where I drove the Nascar on the track here in Vegas. The deal is called the "Richard Petty Driving Experience" and it was totally worth it!





So I'd have to say that this was the best birthday ever! Not to mention; we finished it off on Sunday with the Chargers beating the Cowboys! Go Bolts!

Janna Shreds!

Here is a quick video of my friend Janna shredding up in Colorado! I love this video Janna so stoked for you!

Christmas Series

This year we are doing a Christmas series in our High School Ministry called: "Putting Christ back in Christmas". Lately I, as a pastor, have been extremely convicted by the way society has treated Christmas. This event that is supposed to be about Christ has turned into a consumer holiday that is all about gift giving. I am not against giving gifts, but I am discouraged about the lack of acknowledgment of Christ that has taken place in our society.

The first week of this series I challenged our students to make Christmas about Christ and not about gifts that we put under the tree. I want people to; give gifts, to show their appreciation of others, and to spend time with others this Christmas season but not at the cost of forgetting about God invading the world to save our lives.

This Christmas season will you think about where your priorities lie? What matters most to you this Christmas; are you concerned with getting the best gift, or are you worried about not having the financial resources to get the gifts that your children have asked for? Whatever your fear may be this Christmas will you take some time to really remember why we celebrate Christmas?

She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.” Matt 1:21 (NIV)

Cheesy Sweater Christmas Party

We don't have that many things have become traditional in our High School Ministry. The way we work is that we want to make sure God is calling us to do it; if it works well then we do it again, if it is not impactfull then we cancel it! About four years ago we had a leader who said something to the effect: "Lets do a cheesy Christmas sweater party this year Neal." I have to admit that I was hesitant, at first, but God has used this event to grab students hearts and change lives.

This year we are doing it again and Adena Rossiter (she runs our SL program) made this video with our SL's. I love it!

Build-a-bear

Before I was married I passed this store in the mail and thought: "Really? People do that?" Yes they do build their own bear and that is exactly what Sophie and I did (thanks for taking the pics wifey!)

So we got to the store and Sophie picked out the first bear she saw (I helped her choose)













Then after you choose your bear you get to fill it up: Sophie hated letting that bear go!













After that you pick out a heart to put in the bear: Sophie decided to throw it on the ground to make sure it was tough













Then we had a Teddy Bear













After that we named our bear; and Sophie wanted to call him "Teddy No No". Not to sure how that worked out but she stills looks for him when I call him "Teddy No No" and she loves that bear we made!

Not My Idol

Yahoo helps me out as my homepage because it shares with me some stories that I want to see; and some that I don't. Today a headline caught my attention so I decided to read some of the story. The story shares the girls side who is involved in the action so I thought I would add the video also; we all know a picture is worth a thousand words:



After watching the video I was shocked! I wanted to write the girl and tell her how horrible this is... but I waited... and thought... and remembered back to when I didn't know Christ. I used to play soccer and I got my team in some fights after our games. I am so competative and when I was growing up I had so much anger in my life; I would have done something like this in the heat of a game (not sure if I would have done it multiple times).

Lets fast-forward ten years now; I think of how different my life is right now but seriously I am not above doing this kind of action. I am just as susceptible to sin as the next person in the world. When Christ impacts your life things change; you don't do the same things you once did, your life transforms. I have had my share of fights and this clip reminds me how much I need Christ to help guide my actions and life.

Foolishness happens to us all

I'm taking a class on the writings of C.S. Lewis right now and looking at how that ties into Christian Appologetics. This week we read The Last Battle and this quote stuck out to me:

“He did not see at the moment how foolish it was for two of them to go on alone; nor did the King. They were too angry to think clearly. But much evil cam of their rashness in the end.”

I'm beginning to ponder how our foolish decisions can affect so much. About three weeks ago I spoke on James 3 and taming the tongue and that combined with this is really beginning to shape my heart and make me check my motives and how many of decisions are based/not based in prayer and the leading of The Holy Spirit.

Sophie feeding the ducks

Last weekend we took Sophie to Lake Mead to do one of my favorite things (yes it is one of my favorite things). We feed the carp and the ducks. The carp are nasty and the ducks are fun.
Sophie loved it!

C.S. Lewis talks about life

Surely what a man does when he is taken off his guard is the best evidence for what sort of a man he is? Surely what pops out before the man has time to put on a disguise is the truth? If there are rats in a cellar you are most likely to see them if you go in very suddenly. But the suddenness does not create the rats: it only prevents them from hiding. In the same way the suddenness of the provocation does not make me an ill-tempered man; it only shows me what an ill-tempered man I am. The rats are always there in the cellar, but if you go in shouting and noisily they will have taken cover before you switch on the light.
- Mere Christianity

When I said "Yes" to Seminary

When I said "Yes" to Seminary I didn't realize what that "Yes" would entail.

That "yes" meant I wasn't going to be able to spend as much time with my family. At the time I said yes to seminary, back in 2004, I was a single man who was engaged to be married. Back then I seemed to have all this extra time to: surf, work-out, sleep in, and things like that. I can't believe that I am still doing school! I am going to be 30 years old in December and I will still be in school. Actually I will be in school until summer 2011.

The truth about that is I started seminary in San Diego and then about 2 months later took our current position in Vegas. I figured I would get landed out here and then start back in about 6-9 months. I ended up getting a promotion and started back to seminary about about 16 months; so there was a break in there. There have been times I haven't taken classes but this last week really hit me on the impact seminary will have on my life.

I traveled to Olympia, WA and took a class called: "Christian Perspectives on Contemporary Culture. The class was on race, class and consumerism; all great topics to study. My yes means I am going to take time away from my family, miss out on TV shows that my wife will be able to watch, have to say no to riding dirtbikes with the guys (at times) and things like that.

But I believe that "yes" is going to impact the world. See I am an eternal optimist. My schooling is teaching me so much about the Bible and how to communicate the scriptures in a way that impacts others lives. I feel that I can handle scripture better than I was able to 5 years ago and knowing the Biblical Languages has been huge. Although saying "yes" means saying "no" to some immediate things I am glad that I said "yes" to going to seminary.

Sophie and Dad

So lately, while I am doing homework, Sophie comes and sits on my lap. She looks at the computer and I know just what she wants! So here is some of our fun that I am sharing with the world.
I love that smile!!!













Going in to give dada a kiss













I think she likes to see herself in the camera

believe

Right now our HS ministry in the middle of a series called "believe". The point of this series is to help High School students better understand the truths of the Bible and help them articulate what they believe in; there are so many things battling for their attention in life and we want to teach them the truth.
The graphic for this series helps explain it; our life is so busy that it becomes hard to see what we really believe. Our students are bombarded with everything in this world that is trying to tell them what to believe and we want to point them to truth that they can share with their friends on their campus.

Here is how the series breaks down:
Week 1: Faith
Week 2: One God in Three Persons
Week 3: Is Jesus is the Only answer?
Week 4: Is Heaven Real? Is Hell Real?
Week 5: Did Jesus Really Have to Die for Me?
Week 6: Is the Bible True?
Week 7: Is There a Thing as Absolute Truth?
Week 8: Why Suffering?

"What Would Jesus Buy?"

Another movie review for you all: "What Would Jesus Buy?" is the last movie that we watched in our household and this one brought up some good subject matter. I am so compelled by the movie that I am putting the trailer into this post:



"What Would Jesus Buy?" started out pretty good. The narrator shared some amazing stats about how much money we, American's, spend yearly on Christmas. The main character, and He is a character, is Rev Billy and he runs "The Church of Life After Shopping". Before I go on, I must make it clear that Rev Billy is not a Reverend. I think (personal thought) that he is dressing up like a Reverend so that when he is outlandish in his actions that people may, key word "may", take him serious.

I think that this movie has great point: we waste SO much money on consumerism! I was very convicted by the facts about shopping the message that his team is sharing. There is so much waste in the world. I wish they would have directed people to share what they could save to help others in need; but that didn't happen.
I did take a few key points from this movie:

• America has taught me that by getting gifts at Christmas, that are expensive, it means I am loved
• America has become a consumer nation therefore; I want to look for products that are made in America when my family is shopping
• I want to use my credit card less (not that we have massive cc debt; we use our cc like a debt card and get airline miles)

If you get an extra 90 min in life and want some laughs and some scenes to make you smile then rent this flick; but be ready to be a bit convicted.

Plan of Life

One thing that I learned about myself this summer is that I need structure in my life. I am very prone to just going haphazardly about my life and I am thankful for Bill Randall and his impact on my life this summer. He helped me focus on some things in my spiritual life that were pretty close to getting out of whack.
One of my assignments was to write a Personal Rule of Life. This is what I am trying to do to stay fresh in my walk with Christ:

Daily Plan of Life:
• 15 minutes of focused Bible Reading
• 20 minutes of Lectio
• 25 minutes of Prayer
• A conscious effort of prayer throughout the day
• Follow, and apply, the teachings of Jesus in my workplace
• Practice the Fruit of the Spirit
• Pray for my daughter
• Pray, before bed, with my wife

Weekly Plan of Life:
• Take a day of rest; Sabbath
• Have a date night with my wife
• Go to the gym twice
• Sleep in once
• Tithe to our church
• Meet with accountability partner: confess sin and share wins

Monthly Plan of Life:
• Use the first Friday of the month to fast to connect with God
• Spend time with my daughter; just the two of us (Ice Cream or something)
• Slot in a Spiritual Day to reconnect with God and evaluate where I am
• Give sacrificially to missionaries and Compassion International
• Have a couple from church over for dinner

Quarterly Plan of Life:
• Get away for a weekend with my family
• Worship with a different congregation
• Be involved in a local service project or outreach

Yearly Plan of Life:
• Take a week long vacation where I am unavailable to the office (including email)
• Go on a mission trip to follow the Great Commission
• Read the entire Bible

I hope this helps you as you figure out what works for you in your relationship with Christ.

Enemy-occupied territory

Enemy-occupied territory—that is what this world is. Christianity is the story of how the rightful kind has landed, you might say landed in disguise, and is calling us all to take part in a great campaign of sabotage. When you go to church you are really listening-in to the secret wireless from our friends: that is why the enemy is so anxious to prevent us from going. He does it by playing on our conceit and laziness and intellectual snobbery. I know someone will ask me, ‘Do you really mean, at this time of day, to re-introduce our old friend the devil—hoofs and horns and all?’ Well what the time of day has to do with it I do not know. And I am not particular about the hoofs and horns. But in other respects my answer is ‘Yes, I do’. I do not claim to know anything about his personal appearance. If anybody really wants to know him better I would say to that person, ‘Don’t worry. If you really want to, you will. Whether you’ll like it when you do is another question.’

Mere Christianity. Page 46

Trade- Movie Review

I recently watched another movie for my Christian Perspectives class and this one rocked me more than Crash did. I watched Trade on Saturday night and about 10 min into the movie Charity got up and walked into our bedroom where she stayed the rest of the night.

The point of the movie (I think) that my professor wants me to get from this movie is the injustice that happens in this world right before our eyes. I am shocked watching this at how naive I am about child trafficing and the slave trade that goes on in the world and America.

The final quote of this move will stick with me for a while. It was in white letters with a black background:
"We don't see much child trafficing in America because we have chosen not to look for it".
This movie made me appreciate the ministry of International Justice Mission and what they are doing so much more!

Crash

Last night I watched Crash for one of my seminary classes this semester. I have to say that I am not really writing this post for anyone but myself: I want to remember this movie. Also, I feel it necessary to say, that I normally do not watch "R" rated movies. They are rated "R" for a reason and I am not watching them for that reason.

If you get a chance to watch this movie (and you can handle the language and racism) it is a good movie. I hope that it will help you understand the way you view the world and how that worldview impacts those around you. This movie really opened my eyes to the type of racism that we face on a daily basis. The racism that we see now does not involve physical slavery, but emotional and verbal slavery.

The impact that racism has on our society, and the fact that it is unaddressed on many levels, hurts my heart. About two years, maybe three now, we did a night on racism in our High School Ministry; I am starting to think that would not be a bad idea to talk about again. This movie has confronted my worldview and the way I live out my faith in Christ. I hope the impact this video has had on me (I cannot completely explain it yet) will not pass soon.